Thursday, August 9, 2012

THE DILEMMA WE HAVE PLACED GOD

Someone was quoted as saying that “if God didn’t exist, man would have invented him”. One would wonder why we’d do that. Would it be so that our level of morality could be impeccable? Would we do that to help our weaker neighbors? Would we do that so that a few of us could claim exclusive rights to the divine? Would we do it to get revered? If God didn’t exist, would we have been able to resist being God to our people? Perhaps more questions than some people can answer, but some will agree that the answer to all of them is simple. From time immemorial, man has conquered man, butchered man, enslaved man to mention a few. If you do a little recap, you’d realize that “God” has been man’s reason for all this. It makes me wonder if He (God) has come to evolve, as a certain educated fool (not worthy of mention) proposed. He seems to have gone from wanting the heads of white cocks and lions’ teeth, to wanting the heads of innocent individuals. The thought of this kind of deity presiding over my affairs scares the heavens outta their positions to me. I mean, lemmi ask you. Who said you shouldn’t steal, take another man’s wife, lie or take a life? Your guess is as correct as mine, God. How then have we made such a merciful, just and divine being seem to lose His integrity by our own actions? Also, several times in history and even in our contemporary, man has openly vowed to protect his god/God. It makes me uneasy, praying for protection from a deity who needs me to protect him. Are we really protecting him or are we protecting the contents of our closets from the public? The Holy Bible is quoted as saying “the heart of man is desperately wicked”. At this point, a few of you are wondering why you should continue reading this piece. Hear me; If you have ever oppressed, cheated or lied and got away with it, you have at that point imposed yourself as a god of sorts on your victim, and we all are guilty. To my main topic. As citizens of this great nation, we have suffered a great deal for the sake of other people’s “Gods”. Be it the god of money, lust, envy or self. Even for the God we profess. I was in a short discussion with a couple of concerned citizens, they being from a certain institution under the influence of God, and they argued that their choice of leadership will always be influenced by the institution. Has that ever solved our problems as a nation? Let’s see how many northern leaders we’ve had ( knowing that none of them save one, belong(ed) to the southern institution under God), Yet we northerners have the worst standard of living, the largest outbreak of diseases, and the ever present leprosy. Is our battle still about God? Do we really know what the wrath of God looks like? His grace in modern times has made us take Him for granted. Our problem in this country has always been the plague of non-committal governance. We’ve let our land slip into the hands of chestless men, men without hearts!! And these people spread beyond ethnic and religious backgrounds. They are the enemy and they (the oppressors) have been God’s enemy from time immemorial. Anytime He waged war through men, it was in response to oppression. Should God put those of us who speak of our disdain for wrong leadership in positions of leadership, will we change anything? Think about it god.

TOP 10 SIGNS SHE LIKES YOU

Indications of girls are generally in encrypted form and guys should be clear enough to decrypt them by substantial tools. Follow these points to grab the chance but if you return back with the face of monkey, then sorry dude you’ve missed the boat. The PINGING game: Everyday, frequently, in fact, twice in hour…..S**t man, you’re trapped and can’t hide your a** at any cost. She wants to trespass the limit of friendship with PERSONALIZED messages and love quotes. “You know, today I went to blah-blah restaurant to eat blah-blah and it was soooo delicious, what have you been doing, good luck for your exam, ok time to sleep…night night.” Should I respect her emotion or should I play with them…Dude, the ball is in your court. 9. Inquires about your personal life: However, a gentlewoman never asks and a gentleman never says but prepare yourself to confront some straight shots such as “dating history” or “previous girlfriend.” Awww….what should you do now..ignore/next/forget her? Mate, if she is digging your childhood, education, family or important things that occurred in your life, then it’s a straightforward signal that she is interested in your future’s deal. 8. She laughs at your stupid jokes: Definitely, she is trying to connect a string when she laughs at all your crappy stories and stupid jokes with her entire body (her giggles are often animated). Your success rate is increasing exponentially because she’s going to laugh at anything you say. Dude, check it out once again that why is she laughing? She likes you, you’re spicy, you have something in your teeth or just because she don’t want you to feel bad. But speaking honestly, you should not look for any logic in it because she is actually obsessed by your magical effect. 7. She admires you often: This statement has now commuted in an international norm. ”Wow..is that your bike, I really love your hair, you know you smell heavenly”. Oh, knock off the BS and get to the point directly. Life is full of ironical s**t and still she wants to hop in, then probably it’s a romantic connotation. And if you’re still confused, then move ahead and follow the dialogue of Al Pacino from ‘Scent of a Woman’ – Remember, when in doubt…..f**k. 6. If you’re with other girls she gets jealous: “Why were you talking with her, I hate that b**ch.” No need to worry man, jealousy is the inborn disease in women and also they are extremely offensive in nature. Dude, she can’t ever allow someone else to pay attention on you, which she possesses. The attitude of jealousy hints that you’re important for her and she’s afraid of losing you. 5. She likes spending time with you: There is no big deal if she wants to meet you nearly everyday to spend some quality time with you. I bet, if she is interested in you then she’ll never decline your offer for outing (she’s not like a tigress searching for flesh). C’mon brat, secure your future plans as this one is the perfect fortune to make a move. 4. She touches you often: Okay, gals are not so different from boys (apart from spare anatomical characteristics and a bit better odor) and they also let themselves go. She often leans towards you as the tower of Pisa and yeah, she may be ahead enough to call you for a nightcap. However, there can be minimal risk of rejection but grab the chance and move ahead for the kill. 3. She exposes the every single thing of her life: It’s a stereotype that girls are emotional by nature and also, they can’t sustain the pain. But champ, they are master in ventilating their sentiments according to circumstances. But whenever, she reveals her private life then make sure that she trusts you and feel secure as you’re something very valuable for her. 2. Her eyes set on you and only you: Goddamn, now she’s is paying full attention on you. If her eyes are totally focused on you while conversation, then congrats bro, it clearly indicates that she is genuinely thinking about you. And she is actually on your radar, when she is licking her lips while deep-eye contact. 1. She cares for you: No doubt, care is always offered by family members, friends and old timers but when SHE says that “It’s so cold and why ain’t you wearing your jacket” or “why are you looking ill, haven’t slept last night” (often she cares even more than your mother), then man….she’s unquestionably in love with you. Beyond the normal civility, this is her boundless love.

Saturday, August 4, 2012

CHRONICLES OF AN ABUSITE: GETTING EXPELLED ISN’T REALLY DIFFICULT

In my first year on campus, I think I tried everything there was to try in order to see the full extent of the law in ABU (that’s if any existed). Believe it or not, stopping at the fountain to do anything at all is against the law, walking around girls’ hostels after 12midnight is also. Well my story today is about how I almost got expelled for what you have never tried I bet you. On the third week after resumption, I was hurrying from my room in Suleiman Hall A2 40 to watch a match in Social Center (Aliyu Mustapha social center for you non-Abusites) and in the process, I locked my keys in the room. It really wasn’t a problem at the point I was leaving to watch the match as in my naïve brain then, I could get it out easily when my roommates (who were all away for the weekend) got back. At the end of the match, what was a good victory for Arsenal Fc turned out to be sour for me when I realized just then that my room was on the topmost floor of the block and there was no way I could use the open window. Immediately, a brilliant idea crossed my mind. There were yaro-boys everywhere looking to make little cash from any job one threw at them. I quickly found myself one and asked him if he could climb through the back of the block, the way had seen Jackie do several times ( In-between the columns all the way to the top) . Like hell even if he had been training for the day I’d ask him to do such, he still wouldn’t have made it. Anyway, he was two rooms up when a man turned round the block and asked the boy to get down. Since he was in plain clothes, it didn’t occur to me that he could have been a security personnel. I challenged him and he just quietly bundled I and the boy to their post in front of Suleiman Hall. There I was told to write a statement and I foolishly did. I gave every information in crystal form, even where my father worked as at then. I expected to leave the place after the statement, but when shifts changed and I was still there, that was when it occurred to me that I was in trouble. I had handed my ORIGINAL ADMISSION LETTER (which they got from the room with magic) to the hall admin and I had no room to sleep in. Like hell I probably wasn’t going to need the key till Monday as it was a Saturday. By 6pm, I started to plead my case and beg. I was getting close to tears when a gentle man in the office explained what kind of mess I had found myself in. he explained that they believed I was in collaboration with the boy and we were trying to break into the room to steal stuff. I couldn’t believe my ears!! I had just given them my admission letter from the same room but obviously it wasn’t enough to clear me. Also, apparently there had been an incident on the next block and by my single act of foolishness, I had put the poor boy in the same case of theft I had roped myself into. I was sad and confused because I was told stealing was only punished with expulsion from this school. I tried to call everyone I knew but they were all jambites like me who hadn’t even matriculated. How could they help me or even dare show up in a classic Nigeria Police case. How I got out of that trouble till today, I really can’t tell but by 9pm, they handed me the keys I locked in and told me they would keep their eyes on me…..well they kept to their every word.

THE DILEMMA OF A PHARMACY STUDENT

Gosh…and the weekend is over. Long time no see abusites, I think this was the only week that actually ended since ASUU pursue us back and that’s the real dilemma of a Pharmacy student in ABU Zaria, and pardon me for not complaining.
Faculty of Pharmaceutical Sciences located at the so called ‘Bermuda’ axis believe me you comprises of the most distinguished abusites all-rounder. Don’t mind those engine boiz that claim harsh conditions (mostly lectures) but still maintain swag, if a Pharmacy student that is having lectures 7am to 6pm, still not that I’m complaining displays full swag all those engine boiz will comot for road.
If it is rocking till-day-break trust me my people always dey there, provided all things being equal (test no dey tomorrow morning). You might even begin to wonder t-d-b for jacking yesterday now t-d-b for partying, I’m telling you pharmacy students get mind. Still not that we’re complaining.
If you haven’t known yet, the pass mark for a normal pharmacy course is correct 50% and that’s excluding the (abnormal) 60% courses. Plainly speaking, if you score 59 in that course na next year be that, that’s if you are lucky it’s not a pre-requisite which might amount to one more year in this internment. (Still you scored 59 in the course oo). I haven’t complained yet oo.
Talking about pre-requisites sef, if you are looking for a faculty with the longest chains of pre-requisites then have a seat, you’re home and dry. Let me explain hear, in simple English if you fail that stupid Jambito course PHYS 131 once (physics student no mind me oo) na plus 1 year in ABU be that, if you carry am again na plus 2 be that, and if you’re so unfortunate to do ZAKS again…do the maths. So don’t worry if you see a reg. no. U99 in your class, na condition cause am. Nobody has complained yet.
Upon all this, the confidence of the Pharmacy Student is still oozing all over the campus. Taking a look at a large number of political offices in ABU, from SRC to NANISS, NAKS, NAKATSS….to name but a few its no gainsaying that we are the backbone of all these associations and yet every semester Pharmacy Students always do graduate. Creating time out of that no time, we have never complained.
When it comes to super duper gals, common do I need to tell you that? Yeah ABU gals are hawt, but mehn…Pharmacy gals are red blitzing hawt then, with correct IQ to go with, and despite the rigours and vigour that hotness hasn’t complained yet.
So next time you see any pharmacy student near you, abeg hail them, they are the jack of all trades as long as ABU is concerned and still keep that swag, sociality, partying, politics, intelligence, confidence, sense of humour and instant maturity intact.
We don’t complain but ‘As Men of Honour…’ yeah ‘We Join Hands’

the prophecy by sle3ki

when i peer into the past i see where i started from
when i look at the present i see destructive sentiment when i stare into the future i see an empty blank space hanging loose like a long blown bulb when i look at countries i see Nigeria heading for a crash oh! Nigeria a people peopled by some selected few why the rest stare and gape in peasanted lookery let us all smile patriots whenever the green white green is hoisted for we all have clown in the closure of incessant strikes bathed in neglected isolation and basked in the euphoria of dilapidated roads

Friday, August 3, 2012

45 Things A Girl Wants

Dear all, I came across this article on the net and just needed to share it with u guys.. pls enjoy 1. Touch her waist. 2. Actually talk to her. 3. Share secrets with her. 4. Give her your jacket. 5. Kiss her slowly. 6. Hug her. 7. Hold her. 8. Laugh with her. 9. Invite her somewhere. 10. Hangout with her and your friends together. 11. Smile with her. 12. Take pictures with her. 13. Pull her onto your lap. 14. When she says she loves you more, deny it. Fight back. 15. When her friends say “I love her more than you”, deny it. Fight back and hug her tight so she can’t get to her friends.It makes her feel loved. 16. Always hug her and say I love you whenever you see her. 17. Kiss her unexpectedly. 18. Hug her from behind around the waist. 19. Tell her she’s beautiful. 20. Tell her the way you feel about her and actually mean it. 21. Open doors for her, walk her to her car – it makes her feel protected, plus it never hurts to act like a gentleman. 22. Tell her she’s your everything – only if you mean it. 23. If it seems like there is something wrong, ask her – if she denies something being wrong, it means she doesn't want to talk about it – so just hug her. 24. Make her feel loved. 25. Kiss her in front of other girls you know WE MIGHT DENY IT BUT WE ACTUALLY LIKE AND KINDA WANT YOU TO TICKLE US 26. Don’t lie to her. 27. DON’T cheat on her. 28. Take her ANYWHERE she wants. 29. Text message or call her in the morning and tell her have a good day at school, and how much you miss her. 30. Be there for her whenever she needs you, and even when she doesn’t need you, just be there so she’ll know that she can always count on you. 31. Hold her close when she’s cold so she can hold you too. 32. When you are alone hold her close and kiss her. 33. Kiss her on the cheek; (it will give her the hint that you want to kiss her). 34. While in the movies, put your arm around her and then she will automatically put her head on your shoulder, then lean in and tilt her chin up and kiss her lightly. 35. Don’t ever tell her to leave even jokingly or act like you’re mad. If she’s upset, comfort her. 36. When people diss her, stand up for her. 37. Look deep into her eyes and tell her you love her. 38. Lay down under the stars and put her head on your chest so she can listen to the steady beat of your heart, link your fingers together while you whisper to her as she rests her eyes and listens to you. 39. When walking next to each other grab her hand. 40. When you hug her, hold her in your arms as long as possible. MAKE SURE SHE KNOWS SHES LOVED. 41. Call or text her at night to wish her sweet dreams. 42. Comfort her when she cries and wipe away her tears. 43. Take her for long walks at night. 44. Always remind her how much you love her. 45. Sit on top of her and tell her how much you love her and then bend down to her face and kiss her while you’re sitting on her. You’ll never know when she needs just a little more love

SAD! Parents Kill Their Daughter For Refusing Her "Arranged" Husband

LONDON (AP) — The girl was murdered by her Pakistani parents for her Western ways. And it was her little sister who bravely told jurors how her mother and father suffocated the 17-year-old with a plastic bag — gripping testimony that led to her parents' murder conviction on Friday. Justice Roderick Evans sentenced Iftikhar, 52, and Farzana Ahmed, 49, to life in prison for killing their daughter, Shafilea, in 2003. The couple — first cousins from the Pakistani village of Uttam — were ordered to serve a minimum of 25 years in prison. "She was being squeezed between two cultures — the culture and way of life that she saw around her and wanted to embrace, and the culture and way of life you wanted to impose on her," Evans said during the sentencing at the Chester Crown Court in northwest England. In Britain, more than 25 women have been killed in so-called "honor killings" in the past decade. Families have sometimes lashed out at their children on the belief that they have brought their household shame by becoming too westernized or by refusing a marriage. Shafilea was only 10 when she began to rebel against her parents' strict rules, according to prosecutor Andrew Edis. The young girl would hide make-up, false nails and western clothes at school, changing into conservative clothes before her parents picked her up. But it was the last year of her life that proved to be the most traumatic. During the trial that began in May, jurors heard from Shafilea's younger sister, Alesha, who said she witnessed the murder when she was 12. After an argument about Shafilea's dress, her parents pushed her down on a couch, stuffed a thin white plastic bag into her mouth and held their hands over her mouth and nose until she died, Alesha testified. As she was struggling, her mother said, "just finish it here," according to Alesha's testimony. Although Shafilea's other siblings contradicted the testimony, the last-minute emergence of a diary convinced jurors. The diary belonged to a friend of one of Shafilea's other sisters, Mev. In it, the friend relays conversations she had with the sister about the night Shafilea died — details that supported Alesha's testimony. "The strong message goes out and should be very clear: If you engage in honor killings — if you engage in forced marriages — you will be caught and brought to justice," said Mohammed Shafiq, chief executive of the Manchester-based Ramadhan Foundation, a Muslim organization. When Shafilea became a teenager, she became interested in boys — something that spurred punishment from her parents. School officials alerted social services in October 2002 after Shafilea came to school with injuries to her face. That same month, Shafilea told a social worker that she was to be married in Pakistan in February 2003. In January 2003, she ran away, telling friends her parents would not leave her alone. She eventually returned. In February 2003, she ran away again and pleaded with British authorities to allow her to move out of her parents' house because, she said, they were abusive and trying to force her into an arranged marriage. Some of Shafilea's own words also proved compelling to jurors. In the application form to move out, she said she had suffered from regular domestic violence from the age of 15. "One parent would hold me whilst the other hit me," she said. Her father snatched her off the streets, however, in the same month as the application. He bundled her into a car and took her to Pakistan against her will, Alesha said. In protest, Shafilea drank bleach and was brought back to Britain in May 2003. She spent eight weeks in the hospital trying to recover from damage done to her throat. Even in her weakened and desperate state, Shafilea's parents were relentless. One night, her parents complained she was wearing a T-shirt and wasn't properly covered up, according to Alesha. The younger sister said Shafilea struggled and struggled as her parents held her down. Alesha described that after the attack, her siblings ran upstairs and she watched as her father carried Shafilea's body to the car wrapped in a blanket. She was reported missing shortly after, with her parents making a teary-eyed media appeal for information leading to their daughter. But police were suspicious — so much so that they bugged the house. Shafilea's decomposed remains were eventually discovered in the River Kent in Cumbria in February 2004, but it wasn't until 2010 that Alesha provided the key testimony. Last year, the British government's Forced Marriage Unit investigated more than 1,400 cases of forced marriages, most of which occur in Muslim communities. Britain is home to more than 1.8 million Muslims, most from Pakistani roots.

Thursday, August 2, 2012

A.B.U fashion police gets back to you..... by abu fashion police

The delay in posting this piece was clearly not mine as the report was sent in early. Please ask my editor what happened. Here is the honest report: Honestly, we didn’t know what to expect when we heard about the Dynamix Order of Prestige Awards night. Seeing as Dynamix is one of the oldest cliques in ABU and they’re known for always pulling in the crowds, (meat) to our ABU fashion police abattoir *evil laugh*. So we’d like to start by saying we weren’t exactly wowed by the turnout to the D.O.P’s. the entire attendance was just about half of what we’d normally expect from a Dynamix gig. Apparently there was this Engine 3:13 party that was going on at the same time and all the *cough* cheap people decided to skip the awards and start the party early. Sha, we didn’t mind, because there were more than enough hot messes as it was. It was as though, everyone had forgot the phrase, Awards Dinner. Meaning you wear a ‘classy’ dress. Emphasis on classy. And for the dudes, a suit, or at least a button down shirt tucked in. It’s the least you can do, if you are going to pay five thousand naira to sit in a chair for three hours. Most people ignored that little fact and decided to go in on what we like to call ‘fashionistus Zarianis’. First of all I’d like to start with the trio of girls who came in Leopard print dresses. Buahahaha!!! Da FUQ! What won’t we see in this dear school of ours? They came late sef, as in, hot babes. One of them wore a shoulder ‘dress’ with a hemline so short, she would have been better off if she came in a crop top and her underwear. To make matters worse, she then wore a black bra underneath her one armed dress and we could see her friggin underwear out for the general public’s viewing. I have to hand it to her sha, you must be incredibly self confident to walk around with half of your crotch showing. The other two weren’t much better, looking like wild species of Fashionistus Dynamixus out on the prowl. Little did we know, the lion king was missing three cast members. Then there were the bevy of groupies who decided to distinguish themselves by wearing colored contacts lenses, AT NIGHT. And these ones too will open their mouths to call themselves university students. Granted they wore nice dresses, especially a petite one who wore a white dress with pastel colored criss-crossed straps at the back and Washpee with that ass that’d make most girls die of booty envy, but they looked so tacky. Wonder if no one told them, there’s only one profession where it’s perfectly okay to wear contacts lenses at night. Then there was the trio of Charlie’s Angels, one of them, Hadiza or something wore the fugliest pink jacket in human history over an equally fugly grey dress and the most uncomfortable, oversized Ash high heeled booties in the world. With her stringy weave and her waddling, she looked like Barbie having a mid-life crisis. With her was also a short girl who at one time was synonymous with nineties, in the ugliest quartz blue dress we’ve ever seen. Basically, someone cut about two yards of that cheap satin used to make backdrops in Pentecostal churches, sewed an oversized pillowcase with pocket holes and gave her to wear, and as an afterthought, gave her one of those Mercy Johnson waist belts to wear as an accessory, it looked bad enough to put a grown man to tears. And their friend didn’t look nearly as bad they did, but guilty by association and all that. Then there were the fat girls in mini-dresses. Please sistehs, let no man deceive you, fat and mini dresses don’t work, unless you work for Onionbooty.com (if you do, you can wear whatever the hell you want). First there was the winner of most sociable in a mini dress that explained just how sociable she could be. Her breasticles were practically threatening to tear out of the sheer cut of her dress. Then there was the girl in the black and white mini dress whose breasts were practically touching her chin. She looked like someone pumped her boobs and forgot to pull her dress down afterwards. And not to forget Maimuna, our very ‘elevated’ host who was all breast and ass and a massive pot belly. I guess in her haste to host, she forgot to wear some body magic and spare us the trauma. The boys weren’t left out in the bad fashion decisions. There were the boys who were showing more cleavage and booty than the girls sef. Then there were the boys in those ridiculous carrot pants and sporting shaved legs. LOOOL! We won’t say what crossed our minds when we saw them. Some boys went as far as color coding their shoes and belts and bowties like they were still in kindergarten and getting dressed by their mothers. Biko, we know you can differentiate between colors, spare us the unadulterated horror ehn.. Thankfully, it wasn’t all a tragedy. In our opinion the best dressed ladies in Dynamix were first and foremost, the Lady in the creamy yellow Grecian gown with arm straps. LAWD!!! That Dress was perfection, she looked like an elf princess from that lord of the rings movie, all flowing lines and draping, everywhere you looked. We were practically drooling all over the pictures we saw of her, hot damn! Then there was Tolu Playmates, one of our worst dressed from the COCA Awards. Tolu completely wowed us with her British royalty inspired milk mini-dress with black accents and her natural hair. FACK! The girl looked so good, she looked like she just got off a private jet and was driven down to the Dynamix event in a private car. That is how you make a comeback, shit! Tolu was hands down, a knock out beauty at the Awards. Then there was the uber pretty lady in the black dress with lace panelling, how she pulled that off without looking like a less than honourable lady we’ll never know but she was a damn beauty to look at. The guys didn’t disappoint as well. First off was the rapper Kheengz in his stylish red blazer and legend tee and stone wash jeans, exuding that casual cool that we’ve come to expect from fashionable rappers like TinieTempah and Kanye West. Then there was the dude who wore the black blazer, white dress shirt and pants and red bowtie and shoes, we were so-so about all the matchy matchy you tried with your accessories but your style was undeniable, dripping swagoo everywhere. And finally, there was the dude also from the same crew who wore the clean white shirt with the Ankara pocket, and tapered jeans Sketch I think? Whoa! He looked an exact doppelganger of Kele Okereke during his Bloc Party days, the effortless dude who owns a yacht vibe. We see you. Worst dressed female was hands down = Hauwa there’s nothing sexy about a dress that makes you look like you’re struggling to breathe. Give your boobs some air. Damn!!! Worst Dressed Male = the Dude who was looking like a beat down Bruno Mars. First of all he wore the wrong hat for the look he was going for, his pants were so ill-fitting, it was like he sent someone to buy them at bend down select. And then you’re showing your ankles and you mysteriously forget to rub lotion on your legs, walking around looking like the child of harmattan. Dude, please ehn, fear God. Most Provocative female = A tie off between Sexy Virus and the uber curvy chick who wore a similar see through lace mini dress. The only way we could tell them apart was that one work a pink bra and the other wore a red one. But they both gave us ideas, a lot of naughty ideas. Most Provocative Male = Mayor Dynamix. From the sag in his pants and that the laid back swag walk and finally that grind session during the ridiculously dressed Don-B’s performance, you definitely gave more than one girl out there a wet dream. Thanks and we’re out. Kisses. Ps: please check back soon for the pictures.

The thing called SEX

When I was in JS2, in my Agric. Science class, my teacher taught about asexual and sexual reproduction in plants. A truant pupil mate of mine yelled in excitement, “fucking plants”!. Good Lord, what a day that was…. He got that thrashing that could make the devil repent. But seriously, what is sex? To many of academic standing : it is sexual intercourse between organisms of the opposite sex (hmmm, I feel intelligent). To the youths: simply, many names come to mind: “fucking”, “banging”, talking-the-talk”, “the 3rd leg-walk”, “slamming”, “shinning” and my favorite, “becandus”. See, the thing is sex or whatever you are comfortable calling it, is quite enjoyable (don’t criticize me, I know ……..yes, am no saint). As the young grow, they become curious and start experimenting with it. Some leave it, others stick to it like a necessary drug (which it is if you look at it in another way). Have you guys(and girls) noticed that electric feeling of lips touching, deep slow hot breath, the slow palpating of hands on sensitive areas,…nostalgic, right?! That’s about the best part of sex. Then comes the deed deed which lasts for about one hour (without encouragement…….I speak for myself sha). But all these innuendoes are for the perverted portion of today’s youth; an 80 to 90% ration. And in today’s social standard, sex is seen as a weapon: oh yes, for I have seen men fall to the power of that “honey-valley” and I have seen nymphoes develop from simple home girls after receiving the “dick”! Sex is hustled, hunted, researched, bargained and negotiated for, and the funny thing is that; once orgasm is achieved, the craze fades. God is wonderful. My reason for saying that now is this, that thing called orgasm is pretty smaller in humans than is pigs!!! Yeah!! A pig (male), experiences 12 orgasms after ejaculation on its own. Can you beat that?!! Secondly, women crave sex more than men but in all right of irrational behavior, women can rationalize and control their urges ( It is about the only place where most women can begin to phantom the word “RATIONAL”). Men tend to sacrifice honor for a few hours of sweat. All this because of misdirection. We’ve at one point or the other faced sex in prints, in the media and other outlets. For example, in the advert to sell an electronic or an automobile, a sexy lady maybe the anchor for such a piece. Ever wondered why? Don’t get me started on pornography! Is it the girl or the guy that look so healthy and athletic, making sex look like a dish?! With those implants of images in our minds, we assume we would go 40mins in the act but only last less than ten miserable ones, pathetic misdirection is what I call it! Sex is always a short, brief, deceitfully-short-lived adventure. We just go in, out and in again, to the left, to the right and phew!!! Done and done! The awkward moment is where you and your partner lack what to say other than stare! And you know what?, most ladies view it that keeping your legs sealed metes respect. This is the truth, with or without sex, if your primary brain receptors are stupid, so would you be. Am not saying: here is sex, collect but its not the yardstick, really. Oh!, I’m into gals and all things good, but a virgin can be as disrespectful as a whore! Also applicable to blokes and gigolos! How can I be gay? Another sad angle. Me, toast a bearded being like myself?! Hey! Tie me in front of a plane instead. Lesbianism?! Yep! Most guys can live with that, me sef, I fit but not my own girlfriend, maybe a threesome but nah! Isn’t that hypocrisy? Love making on the other hand is gratifying, relaxing, assuring, safe, sweet, syntilating, and oh!( other words I ain’t thinking of). That aspect is higher than sex, not mechanical or stressed. Not found in a store or school but in marriage. SO WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!

A.B.U sets strict social rules.

The administration of Ahmadu Bello University has issued a directive to all female students through the security department, prohibiting hugging of male students on campus grounds. the act which in ABU is seen as a mode of greeting between students of the opposite sex(mainly christians as the islamic religion and the northern culture don't smile at it) has been frowned at for a while now by the school authority. the prohibition of hugging though seems to come from the increased rate of sexual immorality as a security personnel who begged to remain anonymous stated. He said it had been fully enforced on the school's annex campus in Kongo where the Law and Administration faculties are. He also went on to add that any set of students caught in the act will be treated as though they were "caught having sex in public". It should be recalled that last year there was a report that stated that students will be made to wear uniforms on campus soon, and this seems to be gathering up steam. What the students' reaction will be still remains to be seen as there is no clear representation of the student body aside from the school's created SRC (Students' Representative Council) which many students believe are just figure heads.